Sex and the Married Man!
With our church going through a series called “Man vs. Wild” I have felt that there are some areas of life that a lot of churches tend to shy away from when it comes to being a man of God. So with that I have been taking some time to really evaluate the area of sex and how we present sex to the Christian man.
When it comes to the single man we are always saying wait until you are married. Which is the biblical standard that with out the biblical union of marriage sex is something that is not complete, is not perfect, and not fulfilling the way God intended it to be. It also is not great. Sex between a husband and a wife is to be great, awesome, incredible, fantastic, what ever word you want to describe it. At least that is the way that I feel. (My wife is embarrassed now) This is the way that we present it to the Christian man. There is only one problem though, they are now building something up in their head that if it does not deliever to his expectations then there is something wrong and they see this as a problem. In the book “No More Christian Nice Guy” by Paul Coughlin he makes this statement; “Then at last he marries and crosses the finish line, yet instead of fabulous banquets, he gets frozen dinners for years to come. Such men will tell you they feel robbed, resentful, victims of false advertising.”
So what are some things that we can do as churches, families, parents, and leaders to change this thought for young men that feel like they are being robbed? Take some time and think about your own experience of entering into marriage and the sexual relationship, what were the things that you thought and were they a proper perspective? I think that this is an area where we need to talk not just to men about but also women, if we are to enable marriages to survive and thrive.
What are your thoughts?